Over twenty years ago it was never a question whether I would run - it was how long and how much each day. Most mornings I was up before the sun and leaving my college dorm room for an early training run before breakfast and classes. Later in the day I was off to the track for several more hours of training before dinner and studying. The next day - the whole cycle would repeat itself. Some mornings there was snow and the temperature was close to freezing. Many afternoons were long in the cold wind of spring or warm temperatures of summer. Looking back I wonder what in the world motivated me! I did love competition - working out - and the whole life of a college athlete. It was my identity. I didn't run for my health or because it was good for me - or to have time alone. I had goals - and training/running moved me toward them.
A lot has happened in twenty years. After great success from age 8 through high school, my college track career never amounted to anything glorious....though I wouldn't change a thing. My last four competitive years were plagued with injuries - but through those struggles I met Jesus and began a whole different identity: with Christ. Lots of ice and rehab in the training room was beneficial - Merl was good at ice massage! After college I didn't want much to do with exercise! Why would I want to run, bike, or swim for fun if there was no competition? I struggled to figure out why I didn't "love" physical activity like I thought I should. I am fortunate to have a high metabolism so haven't always "needed" to work out.
In the last ten years however, since having kids, I've wanted to "go back" to being in good condition. My last knee surgery was 4 and a half years ago and since then I've really not been able to the things I love. Of course my surgeon said running was not the sport I should choose - but I don't know many other homeschool moms spending hours at the gym or going to workout classes, etc. It is quick and easy. Um - well maybe not easy.
Merl and Ryan running 5k's recently put me over the edge. I couldn't take it. At the start of the first race I practically jumped in without entering and with my heavy camera around my neck! That was it. I felt like a slouch.
So six weeks ago I bought way too expensive running shoes - leashed up the counter surfing dog who needs exercise more than me-and out the door we went. The first day was brutal. I ran 2 minutes and walked 1: for 20 minutes. My chest burned, legs hurt, and I was not happy. Let me add I was not feeling good when I woke up either. I was not feeling good when I got home, or when I was in the shower. But about an hour and a half later after I was drinking my coffee I began to feel a twinge of pleasure. This process repeated itself 3 times a week for about a month.
After six weeks - when I wake up in the morning I am still not chipper. But I feel somewhat ok when I go out the door and can appreciate the fresh (almost cool) air. Some days I run with one of the kids - others just the dog. I am still sucking a lot of air - feel more aches and pains than I'd like - but I can almost run the whole 20 minutes......on a good day. I love the feeling of full sweat - accomplishment - and improvement. I almost don't need my cup of coffee. (But I will always drink it!) The jury is still out on whether the knee will agree with this routine.....
I might enter a 5K. I've only run one before - back 18 years ago when I was "in shape." I would almost rather not run unless I can place in the top 25. Laugh if you want. Some of you just like exercise. Some of us just love competing. But for now I am content with this new habit. It doesn't define me but maybe it will change some aspect of me. If not my mind at least my behind!
