Just when I thought I had purged it all...

Over the past four weeks I have been moving insanely around my house - focusing in on various areas and performing the art of purging. That is: expelling things from our home that we do not need or that are a down right a hinderance to accomplishing our day to day goals as a family. I don't have a problem being motivated for these projects because I love the way I feel refreshed and happy with the end result.

The exercise of "simplifying" our home has provoked me to reflect on another place needing cleansing: my heart. Just like the house, there is an overwhelming amount of rubbish inside me that needs immediate attention since it's been neglected. It is curious how removing clutter from my house is so similar to weeding out the unresolved sin choking my own life...here is what I've observed:

1) Much of the time, looks are deceiving. The house often appears neat and organized.....but behind most cupboards and closets there is an absolute mess. Many times my life is the same! It appears "together" but isolated inside my heart there are the habits of discontentment, pride, selfishness, irritability, anger, and judgmentalism, and the list goes on.

2) The areas needing purging seem endless! Once I finish with one part of the house, it seems I notice five extra areas screaming for attention! The more I simplify and organize, the more I realize needs done around our home. It can cause me to delay work. My experience is similar as I become aware of shortcomings in my character or walk with the Lord - the Holy Spirit illuminates further zones for work....it is helpful but the task can seem massive, resulting in avoidance.

3) It is wasteful when I accumulate "too much garbage." Shoving clothes, toys, and items we don't need in closets and drawers builds up more work and stress later. Not having a system in place and losing or misplacing things is unproductive. How true with my spiritual life! When my soul is cluttered with unresolved sin, frustration, and broken communion with God - I am not useful for His kingdom. My life is fruitless - sometimes damaging to others.

4) Without regular "maintenance", our home will buildup clutter again. It will not matter how much I purge now - if I don't figure out how to preserve the effect of my efforts, I'll be back in the same position next year. I am finding the same to be true with spiritual battles. I might fight a good fight for a while, but if I don't stay in the Word, prayer, and good Christian accountability - I continue to struggle.

5) The deeper I clean, the longer it lasts. If I take the time necessary to handle every item in our home, make a decision about it (in or out!), and give it a place - the better. I need to vacuum, scrub, dust, and rearrange. The more broken and crushed I am over my sin - the sweeter the victory of forgiveness. If I name each transgression - feel it, touch it, and weep over the wound - how much better the healing. I must choose to heave it OUT rather than shove it in another closet.

6) The work can seem impenetrable/discouraging. There are distractions everywhere. Often the task of clearing out the house seems insurmountable. It looks worse before it gets better. I have to walk straight past filthy bathrooms and piles of laundry in order to finish my projects. "Heart" work tends to be similar. My own sin and habits often seem so revolting I wonder if I am hopeless. And, after I begin work on one offensive area - I am easily sidetracked or move on to others without finishing my original work.

Nonetheless.... with each small victory in my home, there is assurance that change is possible. I know what my strategy is to maintain our physical dwelling place.....the challenge NOW...I must attack the depths of my soul with the same fervency. At the risk of sounding basic...I am considering using the same methods as I have for our residence:

1) Decide what my purpose is and formulate a plan.

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future..."

2) Admit there needs to be improvement....that I am weak. Humble myself.

"...Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you..."

3) Focus on what my goals are - and don't be diverted.

"...You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart..."

4) Concentrate on one issue at a time. Progress might be slow, but it is sure.

"...I will be found by you," declares the Lord, "and will bring you back from captivity..."

5) Recruit encouragement and accountability from those in the same battle.

"...I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you," declares the Lord, "and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile."

Jeremiah 29:11-14

6) Never give up the fight - God won't - and He is Good - and it is for His Glory.

"....he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." Philippians 1:6b

***Funny how this post was swimming in my head and I never thought I'd take the time to get it out - but then I read this post by Ann Voskamp about vulnerability, transparency, etc. that sort of nudged me to share it...I can't explain why, except I do have a passion to share with women and I like a challenge! The She Speaks Conference sounds interesting - if you like to write you might look into it.

Hotspot #3 - Kid's clothes/toys (Girls!)

Madison was raring to go on working on their room. Of course every time she wants to paint and rearrange furniture. Not this time. That can wait till summer. She too has a great work ethic in this area and seems able to part with things and make sound decisions. Our goal for all the kids is to help them be the most independent possible - and for every single item they own to have a clear "home." Seems for the girls this is a little more of a challenge, but they work hard at it! Again this process gets easier every time and I find if we work on it in small blocks of time it goes better. (Clothes one block of a few hours, other "stuff" another time)

Again - the room was in much disarray beforehand.....

Oh my.

Much better....

A little cluttered, I'd say....

Nice. Like my desk from when I was a kid?

Allison's corner.....

Madison's side....

Full view, minus part of Allie's corner...I love Ikea....

Funny that the girls had the same tally as the boys......1 bag of trash, 2 bags of clothes, and 1 box of give away. Done! New motivation to keep the place clean.....and now mom is off to Hotspot #4: the pantry and kitchen and whatever else in there I can get to!

Hotspot #3 - Kid's clothes/toys (Boys!)

I am still a purging maniac over here.....last week's hotspot was the kid's clothes/toys. Awesome! I have been doing fairly well at trying to do this at least 2x per year. It gets easier every time. And I do believe maybe the kids are learning how to do it and look forward to it! Both Madison and Ryan begged to be first.....boys won so we knocked them out. Jonathan helped sort his toys and then was dismissed while I did the clothes. Now that I have a system for incoming/outgoing clothes it is more orderly. Ryan couldn't wait for his turn and he does a fabulous job of making decisions, letting things go, and keeping special keepsakes. He is a pleasure to work with!

The Simple Mom lady gives great tips to get started and even provides a printout of instructions for each hotspot. Of course her book has it all in there too.

So here are before and afters......***DISCLAIMER*** These before pics were taken when the rooms were in horrid shape. Some simple straightening could solve a great deal of these issues - but makes the after pictures look dandy!

One side of the lower closet...

Cool....

Not too bad really.....

Got rid of a few things and consolidated the rock collection.....Ryan is doing his own laundry now, too -

Too many clothes to put away......thinned those out....

Oh man, I love summer!

Yes, the boys have toys - legos housed here.....others under the bed! Like it!

So, 1 bag of trash, 2 bags of clothes, and 1 box of give away toys later.....it was on to the girls' side.

Birthday Blessings....

People say that "life is a journey"......and well, yes, I guess we do go from one thing to another - traveling around from event to event. But what is the meaning of it all - and true value of our life? Seems we ponder these things more as we grow older......wiser......as we have more days on earth to look back on than we do to look forward to. I have been reflecting quite a bit on my existence as I've been reading through "One Thousand Gifts" by Ann Voskamp. She seems to have asked a lot of the same questions as I have over the past years.....so her story resonates with me.....

"Which road through this brief land? What is all most important? How to live the fullest life here that delivers into the full life every after?"

"How do we live fully so we are fully ready to die?"

I've always wanted to make a mark on the world - but now that a large portion of my life is behind me - what to do with the future? Ann discovered that.....

"Deep chara joy is found only at the table of the euCHARisteo---the table of thanksgiving."

Could I have wasted a large portion of time with ingratitude? YES.

"Eucharisteo---thanksgiving---always precedes the miracle."

"Thanksgiving----giving thanks in everything---prepares the way that God might show us Hisfullest salvation in Christ. "

Ann shares in her book that she spent ....."All those years thinking I was saved and had said my yes to God, but was really living the no."

I think to an extent I have done the same. While appearing happy and joyful on the outside - still inside I had questions and doubts. Not particularly a bad thing - but I was not always giving God the glory and credit for all He has done in my life. So Ann wondered....."How in the world , for the sake of my joy, do I learn to use eucharisteo to overcome my one ugly and self-destructive habit of ingratitude with the saving habit of gratitude---that would lead me back to deep God-communion?"

She began a list of a thousand things she loved. Simple....true....life changing. And so I too awhile back began my list. And I will admit it has been a struggle - since in my flesh I am so prone to the negative. I realized how hard it was to list the things I love! How could it be when there are so many? But I continue to persevere because I want to fight to "live fully where I am."

On this (birth)day as I consider the 41 years I have finished, I want to look ahead.

"I press on t take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me....I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." (Philippians 3:12-14)

I want to remember God's gifts to me in the past years - and give Him glory and praise for his blessings now. So an excerpt from my gratitude journal.....

#56 - Birthday love notes from loving and unique children....await me when i wake up.

#57 - Grandpa and grandson working together on a dream treehouse.....

#58 - Organization.....peace.

#59 - siblings rejoicing in the accomplishment of another - and anticipation of time spent together.

#60 - precious friend remembering birthday and sweet delivery of flowers......

#61- Loving husband baking cake (for first time in our 18 yrs. of marriage!) on the night before my day and his departure from home so kids could decorate and give birthday love......

#62 - Free dinner on your birthday at Joe's

#63 - Grilled chicken and sweet potato fries......enough said.

#64 - Another year to blow out birthday candles....

this momma loves to ROCK!

Some may think due to recent posts that I spend the majority of my time cleaning house, etc. OK - so it's true - I do occupy the better part of my time washing dishes, doing laundry, filing, mopping, vacuuming, taking care of kids, and cooking. There are other activities I do enjoy however.....like photography, hiking, drinking coffee, reading, and ..... well - rock concerts. Don't misunderstand - I haven't been to many - only a few. I am too cheap to pay. But this weekend presented a rare opportunity......two of our favorite bands - and free.....so I sacrificed cleaning, organizing, time, and sleep to go. And so did Merl (bless you, honey, I know it was a real stretch). We are still recovering but oh was it worth it! How important is math this week, really?

All weekend I was trying to explain to the kids how cool their parents were to take them to not one, but two straight nights of wild and crazy rock and roll. I don't think they were buying it. I guess when I am singing as loud as they are to the radio or stereo or dancing to the heavy metal band or rap guy at home they think this is normal mother behavior. Oh well, maybe someday they will see.....Though just when I was thinking how cool I was in the middle of the heavy metal concert - I looked beside and behind me only to see women older than me waving their arms and singing louder and knowing EVERY single lyric! Wow! I was impressed.

Saturday night was Toby Mac and the Diverse City Band. Great show - lots of fun.

Our great friends took Madison and Ryan early in the afternoon to scope good spots for the concert that wasn't until almost 9pm. Boy were the kids psyched!

These boys lasted all night long.....one boy (Jonathan fell asleep halfway through)

"Boomin' with my stereo system!"

Sunday night was Skillet - Jonathan did his own hair and was rested and ready to rock.

Rock it....

This time Madison, Ryan and I went early to scope spots and Merl and the littles came later and other friends met us too.

We weren't this close to the stage.....it was a little wild down there.....awesome telephoto on my camera.

To those of you who may be a bit concerned we have flipped our lids and are leading our poor children astray - no worries. Went to classical piano concert a few months ago, horse show last month, Game and Fish excursion set for this Friday.....the bands were "Christian" and have been thoroughly checked out and lyrics studied.....it's ok if you don't like rap or raging guitar and drums. I won't hold it against you. Just trying to be well rounded with our activities. Ha!

There is no doubt I feel better when the house is clean - things are organized - or when the meals are planned. This weekend was one to ignore it all and do some screaming, dancing, jumping, and singing. Rock on......and back to reality~

Hotspot #2 - attack of the killer paper clutter!

Hotspot #2 for the "Project Simplify" last week was paper clutter. Heaven help us. Not only did we have visible paper all over but oh boy was it hidden. I attacked this project with a vengeance. I was insane about it and once I got started could hardly think of anything else! I am realizing that my desire to have a "neat" home feeds the craziness of stuffing things in drawers and closets! I purged every drawer of our computer desk area and another file cabinet. I am sorry to say we have killed our fair share of trees here.....but I am vowing not to let that much paper get in this door again! Ahhhhhh! Anyway - didn't get my files re-done with nice labels like I'd hoped and I have one small box of things that needs to be processed - but otherwise done! Since I have so much space in my desk area I am going to try to file things out of sight immediately so I am not looking at paper, paper everywhere! It almost looks downright desolate now -

I am realizing if I would just process what comes into the house better - and monitor what comes in more I would have to do this less! Worthy goal......

Yikes....this is why I crack up when people call me "organized!"

Open and ready for new tenants......

My old stuffing grounds.....

Wow!

Merl's processing corner....

I hope he can find where I filed everything!

The day I started.....

After......but it only looked like this for 10 minutes!

did I mention we live in the desert?

Last Saturday - (yes, I am a week behind) after finishing my closet purging I was able to relax and enjoy our hike. We went to Usery Park and hiked for about 3 hours. I am telling you it was hot....but lovely. I'll take it! Wasn't too much interesting to report, but the scenery was divine. Another successful outing.

cactus, cactus, everywhere!

cheerful Allie.....

the view toward home....

????

Near the top one could see for miles....

Happy friends.....

Ryan is showing me the tail of the lizard he tried to catch....that came off in the process! It was wiggling back and forth......ugh.

Lunch was the ONLY time this boy was still and not running ahead on the trail!

My view of the last mile from the back of the pack ...... wonder why most of my photos are from the back? The pace is so fast! It would be not wise for me to try to run ahead - we impossible when the boys RUN the whole hike!

Gorgeous desert winter weather .....